Thanksgiving has come to a close, paving the way for my favourite time of year, Christmas. If I say “Christmas”, you’re probably thinking Christmas tree, Christmas dinner and gifts. But this period has a deeper meaning than its mere commercial aspect. Continue Reading
On the eve of my birthday, I immersed myself in a little introspection after my behavior hurt people around me. I realize I can be a real pain in the ass, but like an acquaintance told me, you don’t have to stay that way. Continue Reading
Last night, I don’t want to laugh or make false appearances, I’m in tears, because I hurted a person without wanting to. Continue Reading
My friends are as important as my Kings. I have few, but they bring me so much that I don’t want to lose them. I love with passion in life, in love and in friendship. I sincerely believe that I owe my friends much of my happiness. It was important for me to pay tribute to them. Continue Reading
At the general request, I’ll tell you about our reunion weekend. Continue Reading
The preparations for this weekend of reunions plunge me inexorably into a certain melancholy. Even more so, when some people in my circle, whom I did not know at the time, ask me to tell stories about my university years. Continue Reading
I haven’t forgotten you, but some personal problems accompanied a lot of work have kept me away from my keyboard. In a few days, I will return to my childhood by meeting friends from my university years. We celebrate our 20 years of knowledge and roommates. Continue Reading
The difficult question of the acceptability of a free couple or of polyamory by a partner who can’t get used to it. Continue Reading
It took me a while to sit in front of my screen and write these words. The last few weeks have been very difficult, my roller coaster emotions have put me to the ground.
I like you to see me as a strong woman, but I have to face the facts: I am an imperfect Chip and sometimes have moments of sadness that she prefers to hide from you.
This year was extremely difficult, which made me lose my balance and my smile. With all the disappearances around me, I realize that the lack of you is a trial that has left deep unclosed wounds. I mask this pain on a daily basis, but life sometimes revives it like this emptiness left.
The most difficult thing to live now is the lack of a daily life together, that of a long history together, such as the creation of new memories and the absence of a future in common. Our journey together came to an abrupt end without my being prepared for it. But, can we prepare for this departure?
After all, what would I have done had I known what would happen? Would I have benefited more from you, from your wisdom? I would have probably loudly claimed my love for you because I did not show you enough.
Never, I thought I could survive this pain, your departure. As soon as you abandoned me, the mourning settled in my soul and never left me. I tried to stifle my pain, but I could not calm him down.
So I cry, I laugh, I live, but that does not prevent my suffering deaf to exist, even if it does not say itself, it does not see, it does not scream and especially it does not say to the other.
Not a day without thinking of you. I talk to you daily looking at the stars looking for a sign from you that would guide me in this meaningless life.
I dream of a parallel world in which you would be alive. I will jump from time to time to spend a moment with you so that you give me courage, strength and you show me the right direction as you have done for months. I miss you and I sometimes feel that I’m wrong, that I’ll never get there without you … but life goes on without you.
I made you a promise on your grave, but it’s hard to hold. In my moments of weakness, I can count on my dear Buddha to get back on my feet, to bounce on me as you would and make me smile and hope for a better future.
You will be for life in my heart, because the love that binds us can never disappear.
Keep watching me from where you are and send me if you can the strength to continue my way despite the trials.
Most of them know my whole character, which makes many sparks, if I’m not careful… Well, I’ve done it again. I know I’m incorrigible and exuberant, but that’s how you love me… (and don’t say the opposite 🤣) Continue Reading